Consultants, What Consultants?
What perspicacious, opportunity-grasping, self-affirming women can think of - it's quite simply amazing. These self-starters - the self-confidence they display is, quite simply, incredible. They have such faith in themselves. They offer up their expertise in such arcane, inherently-difficult matters to most mortals as making the most of one's life, selecting opportunities for enhancing one's lifestyle, recognizing things that matter and focussing on them, being a satisfied member of society.People, it would seem, cannot find their way in life without the expert steering of one whose insightful abilities enable them to bring forth the right answers to all perplexing problems of the day. These are self-styled consultants, middle-class women who foresee a career for themselves in smoothing the way of life for those countless others who lack their sense of self-awareness, self-fulfilment, self-satisfaction.
Lifestyle enablers, self-styled consultants.
We are honoured to have on the street where we live, two such luminaries of the new culture, the new economy, the new society. One is a younger woman imbued with sufficient confidence to suit up a team of players. Her husband works as a leasing agent for a large automobile sales company and seems to do very well out of his vocation. Like her, he is engagingly pleasant, a large man with a cheerful personality. Even better he is one of those rare fellows: an uxorious man. His pride in his wife's spirit of enterprise, her obvious energy and enthusiasm is more than a trifle in evidence.
His wife bills herself, advertises her services as a Scrapbook Consultant. Someone of my age might very well not be aware what a Scrapbook Consultant does, and why anyone would wish to consult someone who advertises themselves to be a professional scrapbookist, but that's another story. Her services, which obviously many young women consider to be invaluable, are accessible to any ambitiously aimless young mothers whose dedication to the focus on family is sharpened to the extent of requiring continual consultations on exactly how one uses newly-minted commercial products designed to highlight family memories.
Traffic to and from her house is sufficiently steady to maintain her position as an independent businesswoman. She could not perform in this manner without the staunch support of her proud husband, for they are parents to three lovely young children; the youngest now emerging from infancy. He is as capable of performing the parenthood chores and duties as is his wife and he prides himself justifiably on his capabilities, taking over from her when required to ensure she has the freedom to attend meetings of other consultants, whether in town or out of town for relatively extended periods.
Is this not the best of all possible worlds for an ambitious young couple, completely devoted to one another and their young family, but determined also to make the most of self-realizing opportunities that society offers to the bold and adventurous? Mind, there was a time when friendship and slight social occasions were the order of the day, when women could rely on even casual friends to offer much-needed social and emotional support. The social syndrom continues, but has become a paid-for event.
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Our other neighbour, a generation advanced from the young couple described above, styles and advertises her services as that of a Lifestyles Consultant. She advertises in the local newspaper, effusively and enthusiastically describing her professional abilities to make life's satisfactions infinitely more available to people desirous of her assistance in discovering how to achieve the things that matter in their lives. I recall years earlier that she operated through her home as a conduit for the purchase of kitchenwares.
This woman, whose husband appears to have a good solid job, and who is obviously benignly tolerant of his wife's business acumen, bears little physical resemblance to her younger neighbour. The older woman is overweight to the edge of morbidly obese, but she is possessed of an obviously sweet and generous temperament, certainly self-assured in her manner. Her husband appears to be a kind and genuinely nice person, generally fitting the description of good neighbours. They've an older boy, now attending university and a truly nicer young man, obviously well balanced, could not be found.
They also have a younger son, adopted as an infant, now 19 years of age, who hasn't the mental and physical faculties of his step-brother. This young man attends high school and comes replete with stories of discrimination against him by other students because of his lack of mental agility/ability. He has worked from time to time through the summer months at a local MacDonald's, doing clean-up work. He wanders the neighbourhood endlessly, looking for people to speak with, to chat with, to socialize with. He plays with neighbourhood children, when they're available, who are 8 years old, and older children pick on him.
We've learned over the years how to indicate to him that our conversation is coming to a close, we've other things to attend to, to take us out of the public sphere (in our garden) into the private, where other matters await our attention, and he understands, moving on. There is a family down the street with a six-year-old boy who no longer plays with the young man but whose parents are so consumed with fear and guilt over the young man that they cannot bring themselves to inform him that they would appreciate it if he would return home. He will actually stand in their driveway for hours at a time awaiting the opportunity when they return from elsewhere, when he is able to inveigle himself into their home, share their meals, sit watching television, disinterested in leaving.
Neither the young man's father nor his mother appear to concerned about his behaviour. It's rare that one sees his mother calling him to return home for dinner. If they're aware that he's has placed himself into the unwilling care of a neighbour they ask no questions, make no enquiries as to his whereabouts, nor do they recommend he be sent home, nor take steps to secure his presence at home. The young family of the young child described above, are at their wits' end, but refuse to hurt the young man's feelings.
The mother of this young man serenely continues to bill herself as a Lifestyle Consultant, and to render unto people who have somehow lost their way in this world, discretionary and highly privileged information on how to succeed in life, how to recognize opportunities, how to grasp the good things in life, and let go of those of questionable value.
We have much to learn from self-styled social consultants. This new economy of social charlatanry of a rather odious variety; augmenting a family income, enriching oneself at the expense of others' desires, needs for rudimentary companionships, urgent requirements to be part of a social community.
Where is the humanity in this human presence?
posted by Pieface @ Wednesday, August 30, 2006
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